Dashboard robot will likely attempt to monopolize the music selection
No one does cars quite like the Japanese. No one makes cute crap quite like the Japanese. In summary, no one makes cute, annoying cars like the Japanese. Seeing as this is the Tokyo Motor Show, it stands to reason a lot of fine Japanese engineering and a lot of revolting concepts with no discernable function are going to be on display. My favourite is a robot that sits on your dash and talks to you. It gives you directions and calms you down when you get all crazy due to thoughtless drivers (my friends and I used to refer to this as “Angry Dad Syndrome.” If you’ve ever been on a long trip with your father, you’ll probably recognize this serious medical condition).
I have no problem with this robot if it was actually able to work as advertised, but my suspicion is that it’ll be more like your “helpful friend” who accompanies you on road trips. The person who talks incessantly, flaps the map in your face, has to pee every 17 minutes and just speaks louder if you try to turn up the music. Thanks, Japanese car manufacturers, thanks a bunch.
Can’t I get this in a Heineken?
Canadians have long held beer as a source of pride (and also a source of beer). It’s hoppy and aromatic, say we. It doesn’t taste like urine. And most importantly, it’s got more alcohol on average than American suds. Well, kiss that pride goodbye, fellow Canucks. One of our number has shoved a computer into a Molson Canadian Bubba can. I can only assume this person drank the contents immediately before installing said technology, because the result is . . . Well, it looks like someone jammed PC guts into a Bubba. Full points for ingenuity. Full points for tackiness. “Blame Canada” reads the Wired caption that goes with this monstrosity, to which I would like to reply, I may be Canadian, but don’t pin this on me.
Gamers turn time-wasting into corporate strategy
According to this BBC article, employers are eager to capitalize on a pastime that has monopolized the lives of 20-somethings everywhere: throwing axes at troglodytes. More specifically, doing stuff like that online in the form of MMORPGHs (if you don’t know what it is, then look it up, or just look here). Obviously, I was born decade too late, because Super Mario Brothers skills are clearly not what my employer is looking for in a journalist. Socializing online and organization skills are high in demand, which leads me to believe what I should be doing in spending more work time looking for people I went to high school with on Facebook and accidental porn on MySpace.
